Six Weird Things About Me...

Thanks to Bobbi for this meme. Everyone has their quirks right? I'm hoping mine aren't weird enough to drive away the few readers I have.

Six Weird Things About Me:

1. I cannot sleep without my hand on my neck. Not in a strangle-hold, but carefully curled under on the right side. Right up next to the tendons. I've tried to break this habit, but without my hand protecting my neck in this exact spot, I can drive myself to panic. I lay there with my eyes closed, noticing it's not covered until eventually the only part of my body I can feel is that spot. When we were first married, Vic joked about this a lot, saying I must have been beheaded in a previous life or something. Whatever it was, it happened in my sleep.

2. I love onions / I hate onions. I love the flavor of onions. The smell of onion rings makes my mouth water. My very favorite food smell is potato soup loaded with onions. But I will not eat onions. I don't like the way they crunch, even when they're cooked, and ever since 4th grade science class and our unit on parasites, I can't shake how much cooked onions resemble tapeworms. I buy lunchroom-sized cans of onion powder, and use it relentlessly in my cooking. I'm also quite picky about peppers, olives, and mushrooms, but for different reasons.

3. I have some serious texture issues. This is sort of related to the onion thing. I don't like vegetables that crunch when they're cooked, unless they're breaded and deep-fried. I don't eat tomatoes by themselves because they're slimy. I can't stand even the idea of fabric on my teeth. I won't eat anything that squeaks when you chew it, even a teeny tiny bit. The squeaking of styrofoam drives me over the edge, and I don't like to touch anything made from it; same goes for cardboard. There are lots of fabrics I won't wear simply because I don't like the way they feel on my skin. And I'm not talking "I don't like this, it's itchy." I'm talking, "Eww, this is tight and scratchy and.. get it off! Get it off!" I can't get it away from me fast enough. I have numerous other texture issues, I just can't remember them all right now. I'm sure I should see a therapist for this.

4. I only wash my hair once a week, sometimes longer. I'm including this not because I think it's weird, but because I'm sure a lot of other people will. My hair has always been incredibly dry, and after my second child was born it started falling out or breaking off by the handfuls. After several different anti-breakage shampoos and stuffy know-it-all hairdressers who apparently don't know it all, I decided on my own that frequent washing was damaging my hair. Now I only wash it when it's greasy or dirty. More in the summer, way less in the winter. And it no longer falls out like I'm on chemotherapy.

5. I love to narrate my cooking in a Julia Child voice. This started as a goof around thing with the kids, but sometimes I do it when they're not in the room. Sometimes when they're not even home.

6. I still imagine monsters in closets, dark hallways, and basements. I KNOW there are no real monsters, but imagination always wins. We don't have a basement, but I grew up with one. My grandmother has a basement and keeps all her kids' toys down there. When we're visiting, I'll go down to tell the kids we're leaving or call them up for dinner or something.. and I always run back up the stairs. I'm not getting exercise or saving time. The boogieman is at my back.

Wow, I could probably think of a lot more than six things, but I've probably said too much already. I'm supposed to tag 6 people, but since I barely know that many and I've already tagged a few with a meme the other day, I'll leave it up to whoever wants to play.